Here at the Berman Archive we strongly believe that the past is prologue. Today is no exception. The American Jewish communities we document are all saying and reporting the same things—we’re in a new Golden Age for American Jews. Contrary to opinion pieces bemoaning the current state of affairs for American Jews, the 20th Century rise of Jewish success and global safety was just the beginning for American Jewry, and we have the research to prove it.
Today a consortium of Jewish nonprofits across the political spectrum, along with clergy from every conceivable denomination, united in an explosion of kvech-free consensus to say the State of American Jewry is just fine, thank you very much.
The numbers don’t lie. This latest survey by Pay for Yay Jewish Research Corporation, a rigorous firm “specializing in getting you the results you’re looking for,” found the following in an online survey of a dozen American Jews concentrated mostly in the Florida panhandle:
American Jews are feeling good about the state of the world. 84% of Jews on the left and 87% of Jews on the right feel respected and validated. They see the past few years as a positive harbinger for the Jewish experience, and the fact that Jewish issues have become a front-page staple of American news makes them feel really stable and secure. “Can’t complain,” respondents shared.
Mixed Company? Notably, 100% of respondents felt they could be themselves in mixed company, even among people who didn’t agree with them. They also felt the love from folks who didn’t know any other Jews and from those who didn’t know if they, themselves, were Jewish. One interviewee noted, “Right? Left? Who even knows anymore?”
Safety in small numbers. All of our respondents said they feel increasingly safe, physically and psychology, being a Jew. And get this, 93% of Jews who wear ceremonial garb in their day-to-day-life, reported that their Jewishness made them feel even safer than they otherwise might. One focus group participant shared, “With my big Jewish star pendant around my neck, I feel like I have a shield protecting me.”
Rain on the parade. The only downside we could ascertain from the rigorous research was that this mirthful feeling shared by America’s Jews came with a good degree of guilt. Jews, having it so good both materially and mentally all reported feeling “a little bad” and “occasionally guilty” for feeling so good about things. But, they did not feel so guilty that they would in any way give up any of their newfound privileges.
What does this mean for leading Jewish institutions? Ahead of today’s release, key organizations have developed new directives to respond to the good fortune of American Jews.
Anti-Defamation League: “ We’re closing up shop. After 111 years, we’ve solved antisemtism, so we’re beginning an organizational spend down.”
Betar: “We’re converting to a fossil fuel advocacy organization countering the efforts of the Sierra Club and Greenpeace.”
Jewish Federations of North America: “With no need for advocacy or support services, we’re channeling all current and future funds to a series of regional Jewish theme parks across America.”
Association for Jewish Studies: “Jewish Studies departments across American universities are being absorbed by a reinvigorated American Studies, where all of America’s (and American Jewish) actions are portrayed in the appropriate, sanguine light.”
Jews for Jesus: “We knew y’all would come around eventually. Jesus is good. Jews are good. America is good.”
Bend the Arc: “As the name suggests, the arc of the moral universe bent towards justice! Yay. We’re closing shop too and we’re gonna summer at one of those new theme parks run by our friends at the JFNA!”
And if you believe all of the above, we’ve got a fire sale Jewish Organization to sell you! Happy Purim! 😉
